A few weeks ago I had a visit from a soul-sister who lives on the other side of the country. In one of our long and lovely conversations, she casually mentioned a practice she does when she’s reflecting on relationship issues. It’s called Ho’oponopo. Ho’ what? I wondered? When I googled it, I found this article by Sebastien Gendry.
The first time I tried it I was in tears within moments. I felt unwanted negative attitudes and emotions softening and being replaced with positive, healing ones. Most remarkable to me was that they immediately translated into behavioral changes. Something very powerful was going on here, and still is. It’s simply a way to focus on and harness the most powerful force in the universe: Love.
I don’t know if ho’oponopono—which is similar to the Buddhist practice of tonglen, or loving-kindness—will resonate with you or not. But since midlife my heart’s desire has been to learn how to love, and this practice feels like an answer to prayer. My recent posts about relationships have received such a positive response that I’m reblogging Gendry’s article here in the hope that you might find it helpful too.
How to Practice Ho’oponopono in Four Simple Steps. Author: Sebastien Gendry.
Have you heard of the Hawaiian therapist who cured an entire ward of criminally insane patients, without ever meeting any of them or spending a moment in the same room? It’s not a joke. The therapist was Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len. He reviewed each of the patients’ files, and then he healed them by healing himself. The amazing results seem like a miracle, but then miracles do happen when you use Ho’oponopono, or Dr. Len’s updated version called Self I-Dentity Through Ho’oponopono (SITH). I had the pleasure of attending one of his lectures a few years ago and started practicing Ho’oponopono immediately. The results are often astounding. Do you need a miracle?
What you might wish to understand is how this can possibly work. How can you heal yourself and have it heal others? How can you even heal yourself?
Why would it affect anything “out there”? The secret is there is no such thing as “out there” – everything happens to you in your mind. Everything you see, everything you hear, every person you meet, you experience in your mind. You only think it’s “out there” and you think that absolves you of responsibility. In fact it’s quite the opposite: you are responsible for everything you think, and everything that comes to your attention. If you watch the news, everything you hear on the news is your responsibility. That sounds harsh, but it means that you are also able to clear it, clean it, and through forgiveness change it.
There are four simple steps to this method, and the order is not that important. Repentance, Forgiveness, Gratitude and Love are the only forces at work – but these forces have amazing power.
The best part of the updated version of Ho’oponopono is you can do it yourself, you don’t need anyone else to be there, you don’t need anyone to hear you. You can “say” the words in your head. The power is in the feeling and in the willingness of the Universe to forgive and love.
Step 1: Repentance – I’M SORRY
As I mention above, you are responsible for everything in your mind, even if it seems to be “out there.” Once you realize that, it’s very natural to feel sorry. I know I sure do. If I hear of a tornado, I am so full of remorse that something in my consciousness has created that idea. I’m so very sorry that someone I know has a broken bone that I realize I have caused.
This realization can be painful, and you will likely resist accepting responsibility for the “out there” kind of problems until you start to practice this method on your more obvious “in here” problems and see results.
So choose something that you already know you’ve caused for yourself? Over-weight? Addicted to nicotine, alcohol or some other substance? Do you have anger issues? Health problems? Start there and say you’re sorry. That’s the whole step: I’M SORRY. Although I think it is more powerful if you say it more clearly: “I realize that I am responsible for the (issue) in my life and I feel terrible remorse that something in my consciousness has caused this.”
Step 2: Ask Forgiveness – PLEASE FORGIVE ME
Don’t worry about who you’re asking. Just ask! PLEASE FORGIVE ME. Say it over and over. Mean it. Remember your remorse from step 1 as you ask to be forgiven.
Step 3: Gratitude – THANK YOU
Say “THANK YOU” – again it doesn’t really matter who or what you’re thanking. Thank your body for all it does for you. Thank yourself for being the best you can be. Thank God. Thank the Universe. Thank whatever it was that just forgave you. Just keep saying THANK YOU.
Step 4: Love – I LOVE YOU
This can also be step 1. Say I LOVE YOU. Say it to your body, say it to God. Say I LOVE YOU to the air you breathe, to the house that shelters you. Say I LOVE YOU to your challenges. Say it over and over. Mean it. Feel it. There is nothing as powerful as Love.
That’s it. The whole practice in a nutshell. Simple and amazingly effective.
Thank you for this, Jenna!
For more information, here’s a YouTube interview with Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len: