In a culture which idealizes competition and winning, the possibility that there could be positive side to surrender is difficult to accept. Through our ego’s dualistic, good/bad, win/lose lens, surrender is viewed in the context of a heroic battle. From this perspective it’s bad enough to lose a war, contest, or athletic event when you’ve tried your hardest, but surrendering is out of the question.
A hunger to understand the forces that aided my psycho-spiritual growth has dogged me since I first wrote about the inner life 27 years ago. Intuitively, I structured my first book, The Bridge to Wholeness: A Feminine Alternative to the Hero Myth, around stories of painful early experiences that had influenced my life.
“There’ll just be four of us for Thanksgiving dinner this year. We’re a politically divided family.” ~Overheard at Whole Foods Market the week before Thanksgiving.
Since the presidential election I’ve had a few dreams, experiences, and conversations that heightened my awareness of an issue I’d like to address for the same reasons. I’m talking about the recent spate of angry outpourings from people who have been bottling up attitudes and feelings for years and have suddenly decided to “tell it like it is.”
Last night I had two dreams, my first since the presidential election. They were helpful, and I hope they might be helpful to some of you.
Never have I ever felt so disillusioned about America. The constant reminders of our collective shadow have been monumentally toxic and I’m sick of it. But I didn’t realize how sick until I dreamed of a white horse last week.
I’ve shared this story to lift the veil on misogyny so we can see it for what it really is: a man-made perspective with an unnaturally small lens.
This morning I awoke from a dream in which a woman calls me on the phone to tell me about an idea she has. “It’s erotic,” she says almost apologetically.”That’s okay,” I say, “I’ve been thinking about that lately.”
This election season has pitted two candidates who couldn’t be more different against one another for the office of president. Never, in the history of our country, has the chasm between two potential presidents been wider. Never have so many citizens of the United States or the world been so shaken by this ugly divisiveness.
Until I discovered dreamwork, no books or scriptures, no religious beliefs or sacrifices or regular church attendance, none of my ego’s hard work or good behavior, no well-intentioned thoughts or knowledge or cleverness, no psychological expert or religious authority—nothing in my life had any lasting transforming or healing power for me. But this dream from the Self did.
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