Jean
Benedict
Raffa

New Dreams About My Animus

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I’ve just had a pretty mind-blowing synchronicity I need to tell you about!  As I write these words, it’s early Monday evening, April 13, 2015.  This afternoon we returned from the beach having spent the weekend with two couples who traveled several hundred miles to attend an annual fund-raising event for the Atlantic Center for the Arts. They’ve left now, so I’m at my computer preparing tomorrow’s post.

A few moments ago I remembered a note I put on my calendar several months back.  It says:  “Repost the post from April 30, 2011, ‘Dreams of the Animus,’ this April.” Thinking that was a good idea since I didn’t have a day ahead of me to write a new one, I copied the older post below.

Reading the first paragraph reminded me about the two dreams I had last night. Afraid I’d forget them, I stopped to record and work on them first.  That finished, I returned here to read the rest of the 4-year old post and schedule it for publication tomorrow.

I’m still stunned by what I read. Because last night’s dreams are a disturbing update on my dreams from this time 4 years ago! To understand why this synchronicity is especially uncomfortable, you need to read the older dreams first.

DREAMS OF THE ANIMUS:  A Re-Post from April 30, 2011.

Last weekend was special. I was born two days before Easter on Good Friday; but since Easter’s date is always changing, this year my birthday was the day before. April is glorious in Florida, so part of the specialness was getting to spend both holidays with my family in one long weekend at the beach. Another thing making it special was the dreams I had there. Of the two I recall, both featured my masculine side, or animus. Since one of my goals for this blog is to make Jungian psychology as relevant and helpful to others as it has been to me, I’d like to share these dreams in the hope of raising your awareness of your own inner resources.

Dream #4319: Passing Through a Threshold With My Animus. I’m entering an open doorway. A dear male friend (no one I know in waking life) is immediately behind me. His arms are wrapped around me, holding me gently. Our movements are so synchronized and easy that I can’t tell if he’s guiding or following me. Either way, it feels wonderful to be so close.

I awoke from this dream on my birthday. It was my first gift of the day. It said I am not alone as I move forward in my journey. Yes, I know I’m profoundly blessed to have a loving family, but the truth is, not one of them will ever feel my passions and emotions, understand my conflicts and yearnings, or experience my awakenings. It is my job to know and grow myself, not theirs. They have their own souls to make.

That’s okay, says this dream. Because my animus has always been with me he knows me completely; and because I have honored and empowered him, he will support me at the crossing of every threshold, even the one that opens to death. The comforting feeling of knowing my back is covered by this loving inner reality lingered all day.

Dream #4320: Dancing With My Animus. I’m on a small stage in an intimate room that feels like a chapel. I’m the female lead in a play; an attractive man is the male lead. We’re both feeling unsure of ourselves as we demonstrate a phase of a developing relationship in which neither partner completely trusts each other or their own feelings. We dance around the stage then he bends me over backwards and leans over me. We hold this pose and wait for the audience’s response so we’ll know what to do next. This play is an improvisation requiring spontaneous interaction and cooperation between the players as well as between the players and audience.

My birthday dream depicts one reward of accepting my masculine side. My Easter dream says this work is not over. The presence of an audience suggests that my other inner characters are interested in my soul-making drama. It could also refer to an outer audience which is watching and helping. Both interpretations feel right to me.

My ego’s passion is to know and relate to my whole Self; my animus’s passion is to help me manifest what I know in writing. The dream says we’re both still feeling our way in this partnership. The religious setting means our work together is sacred and archetypal. And the presence of an audience tells me the purpose of the dance between everyone’s masculine and feminine sides is twofold: to unite the opposites in our own souls, and to help all humanity birth this Sacred Marriage in the world.

Next week: So Is My Animus Doing His Job?

Jean Raffa’s The Bridge to Wholeness and Dream Theatres of the Soul are at Amazon. E-book versions are also at Kobo, Barnes And Noble and Smashwords. Healing the Sacred Divide can be found at Amazon and Larson Publications, Inc.

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  1. WOW, Jean. Thank you for sharing these dreams and thoughts. They are such great prompts for those of us wrestling with animus understandings and insights. Birthday blessings come from afar 🙂

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    1. Thank you, Catherine. I love it when my dreams have the power not only to teach me, but others as well! You’ve made my ego and animus feel quite content this morning!!

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  2. Thank you so much Jeanie. I went to my dream journal a moment ago on reading your post – recorded 2 dreams at end Jan this year, and also sketched them. The first was about a table of ‘zillions of keys laid out on table’ – I couldn’t find my own, searched everywhere. There was more to that dream, but the second one was of ‘a man holding me …. he holding me in a tight and warm embrace. He said something, a sob escaped me and I woke up’. I know this is not the place/forum to note my dream but I have to say that your post today about the animus has made a light go on. And for which I thank you, deeply.

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    1. You are most welcome, my sister Dreamer! I have found that my Soul does not know the difference between receiving gifts of support, warm acceptance and love from my animus in my dreams and in waking life. For Her (my Soul), there is no difference: the feelings of joy and gratitude engendered by the inner partnership are real, and they make a difference in my life. The knowledge that I have the support of my animus lessens my need for outer affirmations and frees my loved ones from my projections of him. If I know he’s “in here,” I don’t need to expect people “out there” to fulfill my needs in ways only he can.

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      1. Thank you Jean! We’re having black outs in S.A right now ie electricity cuts so am using phone so will be brief. I used the Talmud quote in my post today!

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        1. Another lovely synchronicity, Susan. I’m enjoying your dream series posts very much, especially the beautiful imagery you create with your words.

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  3. Jean, this is fascinating!Thank you so much! I have just begun to write down my dreams—although I did write down a couple of rally bizarre one’s a few years ago. I hope when I get up to the four thousands as you have, I will be half as adept at finding meaning in them.
    Stephen

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    1. Thank you, Rabbi Stephen. You’re very welcome. I began dreamwork as you have: by first writing down a few scattered ones that impacted me deeply, until an especially powerful one finally motivated me to make a regular practice of dreamwork. As I look back on those earliest dreams, I can see how they dramatized my personal issues and helped me find the meaning and purpose of my life.
      As a result, I consider my dreamwork to be a spiritual practice. In this regard, I highly recommend Episcopal Priest John A. Sanford’s book “Dreams: God’s Forgotten Language,” to anyone wishing to investigate further. To quote the Talmud: “A dream which is not interpreted is like a letter which is not read.”
      Wishing you an abundance of meaningful letters,
      Jeanie

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  4. “A dream which is not interpreted is like a letter which is not read.” What a beautiful sentence. Thank you for that quote and this post. I’m curious about the dreams you had the night before writing this post.
    My dream psyche grapples with the animus as I move out into the world but try to maintain my nurturing primary relationship with the Feminine. In one recent dream, a sinister threatening man follows me and gets uncomfortably close. In the next dream that night, a respectful man hugs me carefully with a light touch and not much skin contact. Then he honors me as Grandmother. We’ll see what happens next!

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    1. Hi Elaine, I love that particular quote too. The animus can be a tricky fellow.One minute he’s my best friend, next he’s reserved or absent. I’ll be sharing the previous night’s dreams in my next post. Oddly, he doesn’t appear in either one, but I know he’s there because I know what energy he represents in me, and my dream ego feels it very strongly. I’m looking forward to his next actual appearance. I need to look back through my previous dreams to see how he showed up before the two that triggered this post.

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  5. What an interesting evolution! What else is shifting / changing that might require the re-consideration of the relationship? In what areas of life is there a faint mistrust?
    Just playing the dream-guessing game… 🙂
    Funny that there is an audience – I have been thinking of you so much in the context of audience lately. That IASD conference coming up… their art show accepted one of my pieces, but it turns out I am participating in another art show here in town that same weekend, so I can’t get down there (and unfortunately, can’t get my art there either as they can’t accept packages at the hotel). Oh, I tried so hard to figure out if I could just stop in quickly and fly home Friday night after your lecture, and make it home Saturday morning for the show here, but it just doesn’t seem like it’s workable, alas.
    But back to your recent dream and the theme of presenting to an audience – U wonder if you don’t trust him to be there for you when on stage?

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    1. Eureka! Katalina, you are a treasure! Do I “wonder if [I] don’t trust him to be there for [me] when on stage?” That’s it! I knew there was a link between these four-year-old dreams of my animus and the two disturbing ones I had last week, and you’ve found it! Thank you for taking the time to help me with this. I’ll be writing tomorrow’s follow-up post this afternoon and will cite you as the inspiration for this break-through insight into my relationship with my animus. I can’t thank you enough. I’m sorry you can’t attend the IASD conference. I would have loved to have met you in person and given you a big hug! Sending my best wishes for a successful art show! Jeanie

      Reply

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